hinajaved.

well dang

summer started off on the wrong foot..

I’ll start from monday, which is basically my first day of summer kinda.

On Monday i decided to smoke with some friends. now i’ve never gotten high before so i was kinda excited to try again hoping i knew what was wrong. but i had a really bad trip and i was freaking out. i just felt out of my body and out of control, and i guess i was just going crazy cuz i’m pretty use to having my shit together, but shrugs. It was not as good as an experience as i was hoping and it freaked me out for a few days. Trish ended up having to drive me home and she slept over that night to keep me company which was good!

Tuesday, trish and i woke up at 6am for no reason.. we watched a movie, did our nails and make up, and went and sat at the DMV for 3 hours to get my license renewed. While waiting for my number to be called, trish enlightened me of some news that i had completely been oblivious too and all hell broke loose from there…

Wednesday was a very mundane day for me, went about my day just trying to keep myself occupied with small asks and when i finally got a chance to lay down and think it was horrible. by the time night came, we finally talked and were able to finally get down to the nitty gritty of everything and said everything that needed to be said.

Thursday (today), i woke up and went over to trish’s to help her with her situation she was having a problem with and we ate at sonics and went to the high school to see old teachers. afterwords, she went to talk to samuel and later i went to talk to phong. We are fine now, but its all a matter of time to build back up what was broken down.

I have never had as emotional of a week as this week. Bitches, sorry i mean ex’s, need to know their fucking place. leave them in your past or dont leave them at all. damn.

but that’s done with, but its safe to say i have a newly arranged list of those who i don’t like. (there’s only 3 people on the list)

i’m ready to move past this and see a better side to everything. in the end, i am SO glad to have my girls’ help in all of this. and i’m especially glad all the girls are back. METH

change.

So i finally did it! i’ve changed my major. I am a Biology major no more, hello exercise and sports science. Such a BIG change! I am no longer going to graduate with a “science” degree, i am now a “bachelor of science of EDUCATION” so weird.

Despite the downfall of not having a full on full fledged science degree, i am utterly ecstatic about this change. It may seem soooo minor for some people to change their major, but i have been brought up thinking i am going to go to med school, become a full out doctor, and all that jazz, but i’m FINALLY doing what i have been wanting to do. WAHHHHH and what is even more fascinating is i’m actually EXCITED to take the classes that line up with this major.

ON TOP OF ALL OF THIS, I was doing some research and UGA’s Exercise and Sports science with Kinseiology emphasis program is ranked among the top 10 (actually ranked 3rd on a few lists i’ve seen http://education-portal.com/articles/Top_Schools_for_Kinesiology_and_Exercise_Science.html) in the nation! OMG score!AHHH so crazy!I also do not have to take my science classes at UGA and can take them at a community college, and only focus on my majors courses here at UGA. NOT TO FREAKING MENTION i am also most likely going to graduate with TWO DEGREES as a double major with Psychology also. ahhhhhhhh i cannot wait until next fall so i can start getting into these classes and doing stuff that actually interest me and actually help me work towards becoming a physical therapist and getting into a good graduate program.

i can honestly say i have never felt more purpose going to school than i do now. i just hope all just goes well!

selfless

So today, mr.wonderful (phong) did something absolutely beautiful. He was on his way to the gym when he saw an old man pulled over on the side of the highway. So being the amazing human being he is, he pulled over and found out the old man was out of gas. Phong then took him to the gas station to get gas and brought him back to his car. the old man cried. he told phong that God was going to bless him soon and he was very thankful.

I have a freaking amazing boyfriend with the kindest, nicest heart and soul ever. He is so extremely considerate of others it astounds me. I have never been so attracted to someone as i was tonight, he is a babe ;)

Because of this, it got me thinking. I’ve been so completely caught up in all of my worries and drowning in my sorrows that i have become oblivious to the other problems of the world. I want to do something completely selfless, i want to volunteer, i want to get to know a complete stranger and do my best to help them with what little i have. i want to dedicate my time to something bigger than myself. I need to see that there is more than just this one way of living out there. I have been so consumed, so distracted, and mostly, so ignorant of the problems around me because i have become completely selfish and worry stricken.

With my new found free time, i am now going to attempt at dedicating my time to those who would enjoy it and would benefit from what little i have to give. I want to feel completely selfless and feel good about something i’ve done this year.

So thank you, love, for showing me how ignorant and selfish i have been.